Did you ever have that feeling of having a lump in your throat when you wanted to say something but didn’t?
Felt the throbbing pain when you swallowed your tears or anger?
Did you ever have a sore throat, aching for weeks and it didn’t seem to get any better?
Well, we all have experienced this and it doesn’t feel too good.
It’s a feeling of a tied up throat, like someone is holding onto it and won’t release the grip. In fact, you might be holding back a truth you want to say out loud – your opinion. Your answer. Your decision. Your point of view. Something you’ve kept unspoken and to yourself for quite a while. Like an invisible weight on your shoulders.
We can tell from personal experience that speaking out what you should have said a long time ago really is necessary for your health and overall well-being. Otherwise you suppress and suppress the emotions that keep on dwelling under the surface.
It’s a natural feeling to be afraid of the reaction and the criticism of others – we fear rejection, scorn and lack of understanding and therefore we sometimes might stay quiet. In our silence we don’t tell our feelings, instead we reject our own emotions – so in the end, we’re rejecting ourselves. Then we got rejected by our counterpart AND by ourself. Think about that for minute and how wrong that sounds.
Sometimes we even suppress so much that we literally ‘explode’ and maybe end up saying the wrong things to someone at the wrong time in a very insulting way that we never intended to.
We can even develop disorders in our energy point located at the throat – the throat chakra: It is affecting our ability to communicate with others, we can become so afraid of criticism or the opinion of others that we get nothing done at all, acting totally not in our own interest. Also, the opposite could happen: We’re becoming too loud and too self-dramatizing in every way.
Speaking your truth is a lifelong practice and needs to be learned and understood as we’re generally taught by society to suppress our emotions. But there are different tools you can use to practice speaking your truth.
How you can practice to speak your truth
1. Commit to honesty
Promise yourself to always say what you want to say, even though other people might have a different opinion to yours. Of course, we don’t want to throw our words around hurting other people. But even if you know someone will not be happy about what you have to say, say it. Do it in a gentle way, but stand your point.
2. Involve your friends
If you feel like you need a little support with speaking your truth, tell your friends about your problem. Tell them that you often just hush, even though a thousand things are going through your head. Explain to them that you need to learn to speak your truth and stand your point and ask them to push you if they have the feeling you are suppressing emotions. Ask them to dig deeper if you get your ‘grumpy face’.
3. Write it down
Sometimes it can be hard to even be honest with yourself. Try to write down what you really think about something, someone, a situation. Make yourself realize that you can be COMPLETELY open with yourself. You can write anything down on this piece of paper within that few minutes that you give yourself to think about it. Even if there are some sentences that you would never ever read out loud in front of people, it is extremely important to write them down for yourself. Let it sink in and carry out that these are your emotions, this is your truth even though it might be painful, shameful or hurtful. It is all right.
4. Be honest to yourself
If you can’t be honest to yourself, to whom else could you ever be honest to? Admit to yourself how you really feel. Accept your own flaws. Maybe admit to yourself ‘I’m lazy.’ ‘I’m selfish sometimes.’ ‘I’m very sensitive.’ ‘I’m not as strong as I want others to believe.’ ‘I can’t spend time alone with myself.’
And you know what? It’s totally OK to be lazy or selfish sometimes or whatever else you think your ‘flaws’ are. At least you noticed them, right? Now you can work on the WHY. Go deep inside yourself and notice how being lazy is supposed to make you feel in that moment when you feel like you’re being lazy. Is it comfort you are seeking? Distance from the outside world? Inner peace? – Be honest, and it might just make you know yourself better.
5. Stop the fear of being yourself
Your opinion, your answer, your decision, your point of view is worth something! Even if you’re the only one holding that point of view.
Maybe your truth is wrong – then you might learn something, and get a new experience to work with. But maybe you’re also right and the only one seeing what everyone else is missing. So never be afraid to tell what you think!
We hope we could give you a little inspiration to be honest to yourself and to others. Tell us about it in the comments : )
And always remember: Say what you think, but think about how you say it before you speak.
Lots of love,
Isabelle Gloria & Elaine Valerie